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| CANADA'S SOURCE FOR CARTOON HUMOUR, PARODY, AND SATIRE
AMERICAN DESERT-- The wily coyote may have passed on to that great desert highway in the sky, but his goofy gadgets, hare-brained inventions, and patented roadrunner traps could still be a threat to tourists traveling through the Arizona and New Mexico deserts.
State officials reported that there was still a strong possibility that aging rockets, iron cannons, snares, nets, explosives, and other assorted wacky boobytraps from the Coyote/Road Runner conflict in the mid 1950's may still remain unaccounted for, and that there is a real threat to humans, as well as state wildlife. There are no maps telling you where you can step safely, and details from early Looney Tunes cartoon storyboards are sketchy at best. For those living along state highways, the simple act of driving the family wagon to Louie's Gas 'N Food in Yuma is dangerous. And for the hundreds of off-road adventurers, prairie dog hunters, and mesa-visiting tourists, these Acme-riddled plains remain a serious threat to life. "You should always be cautious of 'Free Bird Seed' no matter where you see it," says Lloyd Axworthy, honorary chairman of the International Landmine Foundation (ILF). "That seed could contain iron pellets, sleeping agents, or some sort of poison. And it's quite possible that there is a large boulder perched precariously nearby." The ILF is a charitable organization devoted to eradicating the world of anti-personnel and anti-roadrunner devices. Since 1986, they have been committed to the removal of Wile E. Coyote's tools of devastation. "There are still over 60 million landmines remaining worldwide, but there are at least a dozen or so roadrunner traps spread throughout Arizona and New Mexico," admits Lloyd. "And tiny umbrellas won't protect from being flattened in the real world." Acme Industries safety supervisor Charles Edmund Jr. suggests that you avoid long wooden chutes. "There's a good chance that there's a load of bowling balls at the top of that chute waiting to crash down on you. There may even be a stick of dynamite protruding from a finger hole." Charles also
suggests that travelers avoid large rubber slingshots, giant magnets,
and cliff faces painted to look like tunnel openings.
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| This fictional story about satire is intended for adults. | The World Leader in Canadian humour, humor, parody, and satire. | |
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