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| CANADA'S SOURCE FOR HUMOUR, PARODY, AND SATIRE
VANCOUVER, BC-- Sheldon Whittneir lives in a modern society. He believes he has good values, he has a healthy respect for women, and he is courteous towards the elderly and the infirmed. Overall, Sheldon is a good guy.
But last week when he brought his friend Tessa Wright over to meet his parents, his mother reacted with shock and disdain. "I don't want my Sheldon dating no coloured girls," exclaimed Edith Whittneir, 58. "There are enough blondes, brunettes, and redheads in Vancouver for him to associate with." Sheldon was completely embarrassed by his mother's reaction. "My mother is a tolerant woman, but I was totally unprepared for the way she reacted to Tess," said Sheldon. "Had I even brought up the subject of Bobbi, I'm sure she would have flipped her wig." Sheldon is thirty-two and lives in a one-bedroom apartment in Vancouver's liberal West End. His friends and co-workers are supportive of his choice to date coloured women. "If I were to judge a woman by the colour of her hair, I would be no better than my mom," said Sheldon, getting to the roots of the matter. "It doesn't matter to me if a girl used to have dull listless brown hair, or if she started to show a little grey. It's what's inside that matters." Bobbi Levington, 29, has had fiery magenta hair for almost all of 2001. "You get used to the stares," said Bobbi. "But it's the derogatory remarks that really hurt. Like when they call me 'the clown princess of McDonaldland'. It cuts deep." Tessa, 28, understood Mrs. Whittneir's reaction, and didn't blame her. "I can understand the initial shock of seeing a girl with chartreuse coloured hair walking into her home," said Tessa. "But I fought hard to be able to have this hair colour at work. And people have dyed for less." Sheldon intends
to have a long chat with his mother. "She's going to have to deal
with it," said Sheldon. "If I choose to marry Tessa or Bobbi,
the Whittneirs will become multi-coloured. Our children may even have
coloured hair one day. I wouldn't want their grandmother to think anything
less of them for that."
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| This fictional story about coloured girls is intended for adults. | The World Leader in Canadian humour, humor, parody, and satire. | |
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