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| CANADA'S SOURCE FOR E-COMMERCE HUMOUR, PARODY, AND SATIRE
You will not believe what arrived in my e-mailbox yesterday! I am so stoked up about this latest offer that mama's carrotcake will taste just a little bit sweeter when I'm eating it in the kitchen of our new home! That's right, we're going to be able to get our dreamhome...with no money down, no credit check, and no collateral. There's a pamphlet on its may to me right now, and I do believe that $24.95 is a small price to pay for a life lived in comfort. Oh Sweet Glory, can you believe what this will mean? It will mean that I willl be able to have that amazing home office I've always wanted. Mama will have that spacious two-car garage she has desired since before we got our first Oldsmobile. She might even get that jacuzzi tub that she and her girlfriends always seem to giggle about. Girl, I'll be so giddy by then, I'll make my own bubbles for you. Why has it taken so long for these people to get in touch with me through my e-mail account? You know I would have loved to have invested in real estate earlier on in my entreprenuerial career, but circumstances have kept me from achieving that, until now. But Holy Mother of Peaches, you would not believe this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. You must realize that these fine homeowner insurer typers aren't making this kind of offer to just anyone. I presume they decided to look at my strength of character instead of my weakness of credit. You know I've been working to correct that situation, and I could talk about that offshore water-filtering company for hours, but that's a story for another time. It is quite apparent that recognized my Internet acumen and the vast potential of my online investments. They surely must have been reading my column. It seems quite likely that Cecil will soon be getting cheques delivered into his fancy new mailbox. Maybe one of those beauties that is shapd like a barn or something. I'll tell mama that I'm going for a drive to pick up the mail, I'll get in my car, and drive all the way to the end of the driveway. Heh heh. Oh those
times they are approaching. The grass is going to be greener, now that
I'll soon have a lawn.
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| This fictional story about satire is intended for adults. | The World Leader in Canadian humour, humor, parody, and satire. | |
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Business and E-Commerce Solutions from Cecil Sechelles
