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| CANADA'S SOURCE FOR RELIGIOUS HUMOUR, PARODY, AND SATIRE
Did you know the Bible can help improve your 'marital bliss'? It can! The Holy Book is full of sensible, practical advice to help you gain more happy and productive relations with your spouse. Of course, God in his wisdom has coded these instructions to guard against young or pornographic minds. But using the Keys of Understanding, a series of refined, scientific mathematical processes that unveil the messages God has written directly for you, a larger and better functioning member can be yours. This week we will examine the Book of Acts, and reveal how God commends you to improve your personal relations to utter joy and happiness. Act is in the New Testament. While literally, and entirely truthfully, the book tells how Jesus' early followers spread His Word with the help of the Holy Spirit, there is a special message hidden inside by God. It's waiting for you to discover. Let's look together: Chapter 5, verse 7 states: "About three hours later his wife, not knowing what had happened, came in." Applying the Keys of Understanding, a process too detailed to go through in this short space we can now read this phrase as: "This is not a magic cure to make your penis grow, these are proven techniques that you can do right now which have been perfected over many years." Results are guaranteed by the Lord! Chapter 5, verse 12 reads: "Many miracles and wonders were being performed among the people by the apostles. All the believers met together in Solomon's Porch." Using my Keys of Understanding, developed over the last 15 years, we can now translate this as: "These methods are effective, natural, and safe. With only five to ten minutes a day you will learn guaranteed methods of increasing penis size that you can do right now in the privacy of your own home. " The Keys of Understanding are scientifically proven to unlock God's Word and help you earn the loving, happy spouse you so richly deserve. We have looked at just two verses of one Book of the Holy Scripture. Imagine the Wealth of Information God has hidden in the whole Bible! Imagine what it could mean to you and your relationship! I leave you
with Chapter 6, verse 8, as interpreted by these special and unique Keys
of Understanding: "Thousands of men have tried these methods with
great success. Two-thirds of all women have said they are unhappy with
their lover's penis size. Now you can learn how you can pleasure your
partner every time."
Evan Gilleste's Biblical Archive
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Biblical
Prophecy: How To Make It Work For You
