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| CANADA'S SOURCE FOR HORSERACING HUMOUR, PARODY, AND SATIRE
RIVERSIDE, CA-- Can anyone beat Pacific Pride? The 4-year-old phenomenon won her 92nd consecutive race yesterday jetting to the finish to beat Xtra Heat by three lengths.
A chilly, windy Riverside Raceway was the setting for the race late Saturday afternoon. Bobbi Frankfurter and Zany Zygote were each trying to break their losing streaks in the Cup, and Godolphin showed his strongest effort of the season. When the gate opened, Xtra Heat went straight to the front, with Caller One and Squirtle Squirt in chase. Xtra Heat led the procession most of the way, but inside the final furlong, Pacific Pride hit the boosters and came through on the outside under jockey Bucky Shoewatters, to prevail by three lengths. Final time was 0:55.41. Xtra Heat finished second and Caller Eleven third, a neck ahead of Korona Bronze. The odds at the 4th race yesterday had Pacific Pride listed at 7-2, possibly because of a slight cramp in her shin muscle. "I guess the bookies didn't consider those final reserves of extra power under my legs," said Shoewatters. Dr. Dallas Vance, Pacific Pride's veterinarian, concurred. "It's that special diet of rolled alfalfa pellets and caramelized apples, with just a hint of a solid-fuel rocket," he said with a wink. "And you can search till you're blue in the face, you won't find any steroids. Why would she need them?" Dr. Vance was referring to the recent testing of Pacific Pride for drug use, after complaints by several other teams that no horse could possibly win almost a hundred races without some sort of doping. Pacific Pride was cleared by a clean result. "Pacific Pride is a great horse," said Shoewatters. "The top of her breed. Her gait is phenomenal, her pacing excellent. She has an excellent spirit and a real go-getter attitude. A jockey couldn't ask for a better animal." Insiders think there may be more to it. "Of course, there is the rocket too," said Shoewatters, "but that only lasts about 3.2 or 3.3 seconds. I have to be careful when I ignite it. I usually wait until the last furlong for that spectacular finish. I like leaving all the smoke behind so the other horses and riders end up choking and eating my dust. Sometimes if the competition is stiff I hit the rocket early on to get a good lead and then hope they don't catch up, but it's not nearly as interesting for the viewing public or the television cameras." "Having a large explosive between my legs is uncomfortable," continued Shoewatters, "but it is a little exciting too, and it's done wonders for my self-esteem. We considered a special saddle early in the season, but it caused too much drag." Other riders are left scratching their heads wondering how to beat the seemingly unbeatable superhorse. "I didn't think Pacific Pride's gait was all that special," said jockey Elvin Robeson, who has been riding Zany Zygote this season. "When you watch the tapes carefully you'll see that she rarely leads the pack. But somehow she always finds that extra power at the last second to win the race. Maybe it's the Wagner they play in the stalls. I tried some Backstreet Boys to put a bit of pep in my horse, but that actually slowed him down, and his eyes started watering heavily." Betters and bookies have been slow to catch onto Pacific Pride's success. Odds have typically run between 15-3 and 5-2. "When you just look at the horse's physical stats you have to wonder why she's winning so many races," said Oliver Henshaw, a regular at Riverside. "But after this last race I'm going to start putting all my money on Pacific Pride. I have a hunch she'll win again." Pacific
Pride's successes bode well for a spectacular finish to the racing
season. Each win thrusts it closer to clinching the coveted Circuit Cup.
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