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| CANADA'S SOURCE FOR HUMOUR, PARODY, AND SATIRE
When your goal is to take over the world, it's important to keep your focus on just that. Everything else, even your personal feelings, must take second place. My name is Frank Herschel. You may remember me as Captain Electro, the number one heavy-weight evil-doer from 1971 to 1978. Now that I'm retired I'm here to offer you hints on how you too can be a leading bad guy or miscreant, and make nations tremble at your feet. This week we'll look at learning to let go of non-career-advancing feelings. Are you able stop treating minions as equals and stab them in the back? Can you callously escape your hollowed-out volcano fortress while letting all your hard-working slaves and followers be captured or killed without guilt or remorse? The secret is focus. Remember you are the most important thing. It's all about you and your power. All your so-called friends and allies are there to be used. Don't get involved on a personal level with them. That way leads to the soft side, the side of mushy feelings and an ethical conscience. Crush it completely! Bury those feelings of empathy for your cohorts deep in your gut. Visualization is a good trick to help you do this. When I needed inspiration I always liked to remember the example of Solenoid Man. In 1967 he was on the verge of taking over San Metro with the Gear Gang when he was ambushed--unfairly I may add--by the Super Six at the old warehouse by the dock. Realizing the jig was up, Solenoid Man started firing at his own men, creating the confusion he needed to escape. Honour means nothing when you have to save your skin. Your "friends" are made up of water and about $1.67 worth of chemicals. I don't know about you, but I figure my career is worth more than that. Once you've
hardened your heart and can knock off your best friends and allies at
the drop of a rubber mask you'll be well on your way to taking over the
world!
Captain Electro's Archive Of Evil Tips
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Step By Step Guide With Former Evil Genius Captain Electro
