CANADA'S SOURCE FOR HUMOUR, PARODY, AND SATIRE

Text Ads and Text Links on The Toque
Text Security Cameras
Humor TopSites
Biting Satire
Funniest Jokes
Super Duper Pages Directory
Online Golf
Dating Women
Bowling
Diet Weight Loss
Apartments For Rent
Home Equity Loan
Fucked Up Link Dump
Electric Bikes
Learn English
Free MP3s
Funny Pets
Home Garden Centers
Canada Travel
Funny Signs
Good Canadian Website
Free Emoticon Smiley Generator
Really Bad Hair
Womens Health
Poker Gaming Sites
I Have To Confess
Cel Phones
Refreshing News
Rewarding Loans
Car Insurance
Lying Scumbag
Pet Names
Free Website Games
Myspace Layouts
Wacky Videos
Puzzles And Stuff
Text Link Advertising
Modest Houses
Language School
Start Your Own Cult
Evil Guide
Grouchy Joe Proud American
Bachelor Tips
Domain Under Construction
The Lord Above
Virtual Web Log
Nude Pictures Of Jessica Simpson
Geek Jokes, Computer Jokes
Funny Baby Pictures
Adult Jokes
Funny, Strange, Bizarre New Stories & Pictures!
Daily Humor, Satire, And Funny Stories
Advertise Text Links on The Toque
 

AT THE RANGE-- Archery is a disciplined sport where an athlete uses patience and a keen eye, fighting against wind and gravity to strike an immobile target some 50 yards away. But archery enthusiast Kent Chou wants something more. Kent wants to hunt "live" targets.

Kent Chou really wants to hunt or shoot something other than these boring targets.

"It would be really neat to be able to actually kill something," said Kent, who has been shooting arrows at non-moving targets for five months, since he took up the sport. "Shooting at paper targets is okay for practice, but I need something more. This is going to get boring pretty quick."

"I don't know about hunting animals though, that's not really exciting either. They can't fight back. What we really need is some kind of human hunting thing, like that island of that doctor. I think it's Dr. Monroe or something."

"Or else orcs. If we lived in a Tolkien utopia, I could be shooting orcs for breakfast... no, not literally, but you know what I mean. It would be cool to hang with the elves too. We could trade stories about how many evil guys we shot."

"Or how about some kind of retro-war? Like the Huns. Man, they had it great," said Kent. "They lived out on the plains, and shot enemies from the backs of their horses. That must have been sweet. It would be just like Age of Empires, but a lot better. I can see myself picking off Hungarians and Poles." Kent then practiced taking out an imaginary Russian serf trying to revolt.

"Or what if we were in 11th century England? I could knock off rabid Celts with a sturdy yew longbow. Or fight off Moors or something! Man, I'm living in the wrong time!"

"I wouldn't want to be at Agincourt though. I heard they got hungry and barely made it back. That's not for me. I like the feasting thing too. You got to be able to have a good feast after a battle. They probably had a good feast after they picked-off Braveheart. That's what I want."

"I'm not into the Robin Hood thing either... I'm not wearing green pantyhose. That's for dweebs."

None of Kent's friends were willing to volunteer to do the "William Tell" thing.

Archived Stories

 
Advertise on The Toque for $30/month
Raisins By The Pound Mail Order Brides, Grooms, And Ushers Become An NHL Star Overnight Learn Swedish While U Sleep Top Selling Come-Ons Popular Bowling Bloopers Discount Buttered Popcorn Safe Memory Implants Wholesale Vegetables Online Bootleg Jay Leno Reruns Legal Hair Extensions Used Jokes Cheap Visit Beautiful Spuzzum Delicious Corn Lose Weight Fast. Dump Your Boyfriend Nerd And Geek Personals Curb Road Rage Without Using The Finger Hair Falling Out? Buy A Hat! Online Multiplayer Minesweeper

 

  

 

Join Our Mailing List
Send This Story To A Friend
This fictional story about satire is intended for adults.   The World Leader in Canadian humour, humor, parody, and satire.
Tell us what you thought. Visit our Message Boards. HOME | DISCLAIMER | ABOUT US Copyright 2005-2001 The Toque Entertainment.