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| CANADA'S SOURCE FOR CORPORATE HUMOUR, PARODY, AND SATIRE
WITHIN THE CORPORATION-- Corporate branding is a hot topic among Public Relations and Marketing professionals. Defining the "Unique Selling Proposition" of the company, and developing the best way to portray that image is the subject of countless meetings, debates, and in-company fighting and bickering.
One new trend that is developing is taking the concept of branding to the next level and getting the stakeholders--the people who are the front-line representatives of the company--personally involved in projecting the company's image to clients and potential customers. This done through marking--or branding--all the employees with the company logo. "We find that employees really take pride in the brand after they've been 'marked'," said sales and marketing manager Burt Remington. "It's something they can show their family, friends and co-workers and say, 'look who I'm part of!' With a large public permanent mark like that on their bodies they're more likely to really put in that extra effort to make sure the products succeed and do well in the marketplace. Who wants to be part of a loser organization?" Corporate branding can be painful for employees, with scars sometimes taking months to heal, but Burt believes that is part of its allure. "You know the saying 'No pain, no gain'," he said, "well, here that's a fact. It's an initiation into the corporate culture. We're all team members, and here's the proof." Burt pushed up his sleeve and proudly displayed his own blackened brand. "When I first signed up I have to admit I didn't realize how intense the sales team was," said Ted Rosenthal, an outside salesman and employee for six months. "With this mark on my shoulder I know I have to hold my head high--I can't hide who I am representing, and I can't just go and quit if I'm having a bad day, either. Who would take me? It really forces you to take a long view at your relationship with the company." Burt agrees. "The branding has lowered our turnover rate to less than 3% per year," he said. "And there's the added benefit that it keeps other corporations from rustling our sales reps. And, as an added benefit it makes it easy for us to round-up our strays." There has been some resistance by a few of the older salesmen admits Burt. "They're the mavericks," he said laughing. "They can be real ornery. Some of them are loners and don't like being branded. We usually have to hog-tie those guys. You should hear them scream and cry when they get the iron. But that's a natural reaction, I guess. When we let them loose, they're madder than a hornet, but we harness that energy by setting them onto cold calls for a few days. That usually cools their heels." The searing pain only lasts for a couple weeks, and the blistering and scabbing disappears after a few short months. "We first looked at tattoos as a marking device like a few other corporations," said Burt. "But branding has a special appeal to our sense of American history. There's also a feeling of a rite of passage, a test of manhood--even for the women, all that kind of stuff. Plus, the branding has the advantage of only taking a few intense seconds. Tattooing can take several agonizing minutes. A coloured logo might be better promotionally, but nothing says 'Our Brand' better than a good chunk of seared flesh." "I like
the branding," said Ted, who was branded after three months. "It's
far less noticeable than the ear tags we had at my other job."
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