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| CANADA'S SOURCE FOR BEER HUMOUR, PARODY, AND SATIRE
IN YOUR NEIGHBOURHOOD-- On a hot summer's day, there's nothing as soothing to the ears as the soft melodic jingles of TV sports theme music, sweet sounds that indicate the close proximity of the local neighbourhood beer man. At the recognition of these welcoming tunes, husbands and boyfriends scramble for wallets and spare change, frantic to reach the source of the luring music.
Like the songs of a siren, beer music draws men from miles around. When the beer truck slowly rolls up your street, neighbourhood activity comes to a stand-still, as the cries of "the beer man is coming! The beer man is coming!" echo throughout the streets. "When I hear that beautiful truck coming, I rush right out to buy a Miller, or a Budweiser, or maybe a refreshing Kokanee," said Donald Friesen, local resident. "...that is, if my wife lets me." The peddlers of these frosty beverages are the bane of spouses and girlfriends. Men will wander behind a beer truck, mesmerized, like mice following a piper. "It never fails," said one wife. "Those beer men come around just before supper time. I tell my Dwayne No!, because it will only spoil his dinner. Besides, we have beer in our refrigerator." "It's not fair," pouted Dwayne. "She never lets me get beer from the beer man. But all my friends are allowed." Henry Weinrich is an owner-operator for Mr. Brew, a successful beer truck franchise. Henry, a non-drinker himself, has been providing malted treats to suburban residents for several years. "I start my routes fairly early," said Henry. "I'll sell a lot of breakfast ales, and hair-of-the-dog drinks. Football season is great, because I sell a lot of six-packs to those guys who run short, and I do a pretty brisk business at half-time." "In the summer," add Henry, "I try and catch the guys as they're just finishing mowing their lawns, or working on their cars. Who wouldn't want a tall cool one after a long sweaty day of yard work? I don't encourage anyone to drink beer. I just facilitate it." Henry's truck
is fitted with four taps attached to refrigerated kegs, providing a variety
of chilled beers to his customers. As well, he carries an assortment of
bottled and canned beers, meeting the needs of his most discerning neighbourhood
clients.
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| This fictional story about satire is intended for adults. | The World Leader in Canadian humour, humor, parody, and satire. | |
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