| CANADA'S SOURCE FOR HUMOUR, PARODY, AND SATIRE
 Advice from Helena Aunde-Bague
Oh, my sweet dear Nicolette, how I am turning my stomach on the inside
with pangs of anguish over your story of woe and despair.
How can it be, that
in this sophisticated moden world of ours, that such a situation could
occur, with you having to take a bus in public!? I am so ashamed for you,
and I hope that not too many people had seen your face during this time
of utter embarrassment.
If it were me, to
be forced into such a terrible situation, where I must be faced with the
option of travelling to my destination without so much as a limousine
or at the very least, to be seen in a convertible sports car, I would
most certainly wish to die, right there on the spot.
Was there no alternative
for you to choose from, my precious? Could you not have had a driver pick
you up when your Mercedes automobile stalled on the side of the road?
It must have been extremely painful for you to even stand at the bus stop,
and not quiver with total chagrin, knowing how people would be thinking
of you in a common way.
Next time,
for you to be sure, is to carry along an extra cell phone battery, complete
with the numbers of those who can pick you up in comfort.
Helena's Archive
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