A Brief History of the Great Canadian Moose Riders

The Moose Riders coat of arms.

Meese? But surely they can't be ridden?

We crouched behind a lamp-post and consulted our guide book. No mention was made within the first five pages, but there they were right in front of us, a squad of massive herbivores marching stately on their skinny legs, proudly displaying their massive horns. On their backs sat the Canadian militia in their best dress uniform swaying slightly with the rolling gait of the mooses: red serge coats (this being Canada and all, all formal jackets are red), bear-skin hats and single-shot muskets. The flags were gold and red, and bagpipers marched at the rear. It was a formidable sight!

Moose don't have hooves, so they moved quite quietly on the asphalt. And then, almost as soon as it began, it was over. The squad turned a corner and disappeared. The din of the bagpipes was drowned out by the barrage of polite car horns.