The Mostly-Complete Records Of The Staff Of The Toque
Dale Tudge (editor)– Often referred to as “chip”, “Chicken Legs”, or “The Midnight Fluffer” has been working with The Toque for almost ten years. Dale, whose first and last name rhyme with everything, has been carrying around the same brass keychain engraved with the words “Smart Ass” since he was sixteen. Dale skates to work every day, drinks warm cola, and is often seen in downtown Vancouver yelling “Free the Pamela Anderson Two!”
Don Schuetze, (co-creator, staff writer)– Don started working with The Toque in 2001 to pay off his gambling debts from the Women”s Canadian Football League (WCFL). Don, who holds a college degree from Concordia University, is a former chocolate milkman, and pizza-by-the-slice delivery boy. Don, who due to attention deficit disorder refuses to write anything over 500 words, is also a talented musician, proficient with the clarinet, accordion, and classical air guitar.
Jim Lee, (graphic artist)– Jim, also known as “Jimmy Big Bite”, is the semi-talented graphics artist for The Toque, and the only person with a registered copy of Photoshop. Jim, who regularly commutes between Taiwan and Canada, is NOT involved in any illegal buddha statue smuggling. Really. Jim is also a huge fan of World of Warcraft, which may explain why we haven”t seen him in six months.
Mike Scully, (co-creator, staff writer)– Mike, nicknamed “The Rogue”, more for his carefree bachelor attitude than for his love of the X-Men, is one of the founders of The Toque. Mike, who is now trying his hand at directing, may include the rest of his body parts if he is successful. When he”s not writing, Mike is often seen helping the homeless…buy their scotch. Mike holds the record for the longest sentence written in snow by urine.
Leonard Martin, (Sales and Marketing)– Leonard is a business school graduate and a financial wizard who somehow manages to get our bills paid. Leonard, who claims to have invented the peanut butter slice, once wrestled a cougar–but later found out was his sister-in-law . When Leonard isn”t selling advertising space, he is busy sharpening rollerblades and coaching children in full-contact trampoline.
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