Young flesh-and-blood Turks were required to run throughout the battle lines with huge brass wing-keys to wind up the heavy iron soldiers, and were often killed first to prevent the re-animation of the battling automatons.

Better technology and an increase in robotic engineering students in Turkish universities (much due to the popularity of Doctor Who reruns dubbed in Turkish) made it possible to upgrade the efficiency of the Mechanical Turks. Although they saw limited action in the first and second world wars (the robots, not the engineering students) their reputation remained high (as did many of the students but that was from the opium).

They are still in use today as ceremonial guards, sentries, and traffic custodians. Resplendent in their traditional fighting robes, they are lovingly maintained with quality silken turbans and polished chrome slippers.

On top of their stellar history, the Mechanical Turks also played a mean game of chess and enjoyed composing poetry with complex rhyming schemes and obscure metaphorical references. And since the era of the Mechanical Turks, the nation of Turkey has not been invaded, attacked, or even verbally assaulted by partying teenage Hungarians.

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