Prime Minister To Be Cast In Bronze

OTTAWA-- Jean Chrétien, the former prime minister of Canada, is to be honoured by his nation now that he has ended his long term of office.

The Liberal leader from Shawinigan Quebec, who has been involved in politics for five decades, is to be cast in bronze once he steps down from his leadership role.

The Right Honourable Chrétien, who has been Canada's prime minister since 1993, was shocked to learn of his fate.

"No!" said Chrétien. "I am not ready yet! I don't want to die!"

• Airport Offers Porn To Tired Travellers
• America's Final Solution To Foreign Problem
• Americans Are Losing The War Against Picking
• Are Central American High School Elections Being Fixed?
• Chocolate Maker Facing Social Pressure For Segregating White And Dark Chocolates
• City Of Darwin Sinks Through Natural Selection
• Cthonic Creatures Emerge After Centuries Long Slumber
• Cola Smuggling: A Carbonated Crime
• The Coyote's Wily Schemes Could Become Tourist Traps
• Dachshund Fighting In Asia
• Global Warming Helps Iceberg Lettuce Industry
• India Ink Wells Running Dry
• Kool-Aid Refinery Kauses More Harm Than Good
• Lesser Holidays Demand Islands To Call Their Own
• Massive Clearcutting Threatens Old Growth
• Ocean City Has No Superhero
• Osama Found!
• Queen Elizabeth Yet To Sign New Contract
• Really Cold War Heats Up
• Remember The Cattlecaust
• Romanian Divining Cows Provide Milk, Find Wells
• Sand People Prepare For War
• Those Damned Treehuggers!
• Two Army Men Missing After Wargames
• Water Conservation Must Be Made A Priority

CANADA'S SOURCE FOR HUMOUR, PARODY, AND SATIRE

The Toque is a humour/satire magazine published every week here on the Internet. We strive to write the most outrageously ordinary material, bringing you the maximum amount of laughter with the least amount of effort.

All of our satirical stories are original and written by our own staff, without the assistance of drugs, alcohol, or banned sugar substitutes.

We encourage you to write us and tell us what you think of our site. Let us know if you have any suggestions, opinions, words of encouragement, or if you just to want to tell us we've left our turn signal on.

Yes, we're aware that we're not The Onion, but I'm sure they get the same comparisons to us.

Thanks for reading, and come back as often as you like. Tell a friend, post a link, buy a t-shirt, and always remember that a toque is more than just a frickin' hat.